"Satan, where are you? Come out and fight! You're yellow, Satan!" No wonder the Prince of Darkness takes time off his busy schedule to star in this Filipino schlock film - who could possibly resist a challenge like that? I swear, they spent less money on this movie than Rush Limbaugh spends on diet pills, and yet, even if the special effects are laughably bad and the editor looks like he spliced the film with a lumberjack's axe, still - you gotta love the ambitiousness and inexplicability (if that's a word) of it all. A man runs directly in front of a slow-moving styrofoam boulder and instantly becomes a bloody pancake, and yet his head (which curiously did not get flattened) is still able to warn the hero, "Stop that boulder!" And don't let that Frank Frazetta fanclub cover art fool ya either - the hero of the film looks more like a balding forklift driver, and Satan looks more like a guy who got turned down by the traveling production of Mummenschantz. They don't make 'em like this anymore. Because now they got things like, I don't know, cash. And technique. And plots. Does that really say this was filmed in 1983? Sweet Baby Jesus, it looks ten years older even by third world standards! This is freeform Filipino cinema at its finest. Satan, where are you? Come out and FIGHT!!!
CUT HIMSELF SHAVING. WITH A CIRCULAR SAW.
SATAN'S MINION? OR A RARE EARLY PRESS PHOTO OF GILBERT GOTTFRIED? 
NO NO, YOU TWO GO TO LUNCH WITHOUT ME. I'M KINDA WATCHING MY WEIGHT.
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